Lately, I've been down and depressed. There's just some things going on in my life that have gotten me discouraged. Things that have spun out of my control. Unsureness in the future. People have let me down and hurt me. It's gotten to the point, even, that I've been having bouts of diarrhea on and off and feeling sick just with worry and anxiety about some of the situations. I don't know what to do, honestly. And I'm feeling lost and hopeless, cold and alone.
Needless to say, the trials never come without bringing with them lessons to be learned and new experiences to be had. This time is no different. I've been learning and trying to teach myself to first, trust in the Lord that his plan for the future is better than anything I could imagine. Although it's hard and difficult and I'm still not at the point yet, I'm trying to learn how to let go of situations and just give it to Him and wait for His perfect and pleasing plan. Even if I know what I want beyond a shadow of doubt, I'm trying with all my might to push that aside and say, "Okay, God. What do you want for my future?" Like I said, it's not been easy. At all. Secondly, I've been telling myself over and over again to never give up and to never stop fighting for what you want, what you believe in, and what you love. There's been moments within the past few weeks that I've realized how easy it is to just give in all the time and to never put up a fight. Folks, if nothing is ever worth fighting for, then what's the point of living? Why am I here? I agree, things can get difficult, and circumstance may not be as convenient as they could be, and there can be a lot of tears spent, breath wasted screaming to yourself the answers that you wish you could see, and nights given away to sleeplessness as you toss and turn thinking and praying about your life. Trust me, within the past few weeks I've been at all of those places (I haven't cried though...). But nothing, absolutely nothing is worse than throwing in the towel on something you believe and giving up. Nothing is worse than taking the easy way out and settling for less than what you deserve when you could stand up under the flood of commitment and hardship and endure the trials in order to steal the victory that's meant for only the strong. Giving up is for the pathetic and sick. Giving in is for the heartless and those crippled by their own vices and own pity. Who are you controlled by? Where does the hope lie that courses through your veins? Never stop fighting, and never give in. There's always a price to be paid, but the price is worth the prize in the end.
I'm sure you wonder where I'm going with this and when I'll get to the verse that stood out to me today. It's here. Matthew 10:22, "All men will hate you because of Me [Jesus], but he who stands firm to the end will be saved."
Something that I've always come back to and that's always given me hope and a strong foundation is the hope that I have in Jesus. It's my relationship with Him that goes far beyond the boundaries of any religion. I know Him. I love Him. Of course, not everyone sees this and it makes no sense to the world. People hate religion, and they classify Christianity in that religion--even though it's not. People will hate you for proclaiming Christ, and people will hate me for proclaiming Christ, it's a simple fact of life.
Here's the kicker: Never back down, never compromise. If you love something, fight for it. If you believe in something, don't walk away when the road gets difficult to travel. If you're strugging with temptation, whatever it is, or even in a battle with yourself, stand your ground. Don't give up. The war is long and hard and you'll victories and you'll have defeats, but don't surrender from the entire war just because you lost a battle. Don't retreat because the enemy advances, but be strong and don't back down.
"You have all the weapons you need. Now fight."--Sucker Punch
--DyingAnOriginal
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